Dr Taurus
by RelightTheTorch
Summary: "Dr Adam Taurus at your service!" Yes, you read that right. Adam is becoming a doctor. Along with Roman, Neo and Banesaw. Prepare yourself for deadly operations, questionable prescriptions, and a whole load of weirdness. Oh, and a word of warning. They aren't actually trained to do this. "If the disease doesn't kill you, we will!"
1. At your service!

**Chapter 1: At your service! **

**If you haven't read Bulls Redemption, well, you don't need to, but I'd recommend you do. **

**Current cover image is just a placeholder for now. **

"Oh my gosh, honey, are you okay?!"

The man was lying on the floor, struggling to breath. The air had been completely lapsed from his body, and he would be dead in mere minutes.

An advert came on.

_Are you experiencing seizures or fits? Is your husband lying on the floor about to be dead in mere minutes? _

"Yes!"

_Are you panicking? _

"YES!"

_Well, there's no need to, because Dr Taurus and his team are here to help you out!_

_Adam Taurus, a former yandere boyfriend! _

_Roman Torchwick, the one who plays a major role in all RelightTheTorches fanfictions! _

_Neopolitan! Sweet, kind, loving and totally not psychopathic! _

_Banesaw! "Finally, I get to kill a Schnee- I mean, help people out!" _

_Simply call the number on the screen to receive a free medical service! And since this is technically illegal what we are doing here, please do not report us! We aren't actually trained! Simply call the number! Stay Lionised folks, and remember: _

"_If the disease doesn't kill you, we will!" _

The number stayed on the screen, and she wasted no time in dialling it.

_**Dr Taurus**_

"Hello, Dr Taurus at your service! And what can I do for you today?"

"_Oh thank gosh! My husband was coincidentally dying when your advert came on, and I knew I had to phone up! Please, he's going to die if you don't help him! _

"Do not fear Ma'am, for Dr Taurus and his team are on the case! Everyone, to the LioniseMobile!"

The LioniseMobile was a big car, which had Adam's symbol on the right, Roman's on the top, Neo's on the left and the White Fang symbol on the wheels. It was a thing of pure beauty. Or at least Adam thought so. It was painted a fiendish red, black, orange, grey and pink colour.

"Let's go!"

Their were four seats, one for Adam, Roman, Neo and Banesaw.

**For those who are confused, Banesaw is the Lieutenant. Oh, and also, in case you didn't read Bulls Redemption, I, RelightTheTorch, sometimes pop into the story if I want. **

"It's excruciatingly annoying!" Adam shouted.

**Aw really? You know, we had a talk about this Adam. A talk which resulted in me punching you in the mouth. **

"Ignore him! Let's do this!"

The sirens went on, and the LioniseMobile flew down the street.

But then, they met their first problem as doctors. Traffic. Nobody had the decency to pull over. So Banesaw got on the in built microphone.

"This is the Dr Taurus, um, um,…"

"Agency." Roman whispered in his ear.

"This is the Dr Taurus Agency! Please let us through! A persons life is in danger! I repeat, someone is about to die!"

Everyone ignored them.

"Well, guess we're going straight through then." Adam said. He drove the LioniseMobile through, sending cars flying everywhere.

"I'm getting flashbacks and there not good ones!" Roman yelled as they narrowly dodged a few cars that were on collision course with them.

The sirens continued to wail as they smashed through buildings and ran people over.

They drove over a bridge and came to a stop outside the house.

Adam jumped out and ran over, kicking the door in. The others followed behind. Only to find there was no one there.

"Wrong house!" They all zipped back into the LioniseMobile and took off again.

They walloped their way through a park before stopping outside another house.

"Okay, how about this one?"

It wasn't that one either. Four houses later, Roman came up with a solution.

"Why don't we just activate the GPS?"

"Wait, there's a GPS?" Adam was confused.

Neo pointed to a very large green circle titled "GPS".

"Ah, right. I knew that!"

They set off again, sirens still wailing.

"Aha! It must be this one!"

They all went inside.

"Thank goodness your- OH MY GOSH IT'S ADAM TAURUS AND ROMAN TORCHWICK! GET BACK FOUL-"

Neo knocked her out with a kick to the head.

"Quick! Put him in the back!"

Banesaw lifted the man up and ran outside, gently setting him in the back. Neo jumped in next to him.

"Go, go, he's going to die soon!"

They began driving again, but this time, because the poor man was about to die…

"You aren't going to die, not once I shift into MAXIMUM OVERDRIVE!" Adam floored the accelerator.

They shot off like a bullet, so fast they actually lifted up into the air and began to fly over everything.

They landed outside the surgery with a solid boom.

"Quick, quick, get him out! Get him into the operating room!"

_**Dr Taurus **_

The man groaned, and opened his eyes. He looked around him, and noticed there were several deadly looking tools on the walls.

"Where I'm-"

Suddenly, a finger was put to his lips, as Neo shushed him quietly and patted him on the arm.

"Now sir, I regret to inform you that you have been infected with a very rare type of disease."

"What?" Neo shushed him again.

"Don't talk, just listen." Adam continued. "You have been infected with a severe case of heart failure, of which I am afraid there is only one cure."

Roman and Banesaw appeared at his side.

"But it is simply too gruesome for me to describe. So please, lie down and relax. This won't take long and it won't hurt much."

He put on his surgery mask and the man watched as he whipped out a very dangerous looking sword.

"What is-"

He passed out once again.

_**Dr Taurus **_

"Scissors." Adam held out his hand. Roman slapped them in.

"Tweezers." Banesaw went to get them, only to accidentally trip and since he was holding his chainsaw, he accidentally sliced the man's body in half.

The heart rate monitor at the side came to a flatline.

Adam heard the long beeping noise before realising the man was dead.

"Oh. That's not good. How are we going to explain this?"

Roman phoned the women. "I regret to inform that there was a slight complication during the surgery. Your man is dead."

There was a loud scream over the phone, before Roman spoke again. "Well, in all honesty, what were you expecting? You can come pick up the body now."

Neo was gently stroking the man's hair and checking his pulse.

"Neo, he's dead." She nodded her head and walked away.

_**Dr Taurus**_

The body was carried off in a coffin as his loved ones gathered around him.

Adam was cleaning his bloody gloves, Neo was asleep, Banesaw was examining his chainsaw, and Roman was smoking a cigar.

"Well done everyone! That was a job well done!" Adam said cheerfully.

"But we…"

"Sure, we killed him, but, we'll get there eventually! That time, we killed him in 59 seconds! Who knows, maybe next time we'll kill them in 58 seconds!"

"I meant we should keep them alive…" Roman muttered. "But sure, that works too."

Suddenly, the phone rang again. Adam was quick to pick it up.

"Hello, Dr Taurus speaking! What can I do for you today?"

_**Dr Taurus **_

**I'll be trying to make this stories chapters slightly longer than the Bulls Redemption ones. No guarantees though. **

**Thanks for reading, and remember: **

"**If the disease doesn't kill you, they will!" **


	2. Surgery is-a go

**Chapter 2: Surgery is a-go **

_**Dr Taurus**_

"Hmm…" Dr Taurus was looking at a X-ray on the screen. It was showing that a young child had accidentally swallowed a toy car.

"What is it?" The anxious dad looked at it.

"It would appear sir, that your child has swallowed a toy car. Not to worry, it's a very simple procedure to get out. All I have to do is… Wait, before I do anything, are you squeamish?"

"Eh, no?"

"Well, that's good. Here I go. Open your mouth."

The small boy opened his mouth. Adam then literally took a giant metal claw, and stuffed it down his throat.

"Hey, what are-" Banesaw grabbed the man and hoisted him in the air, carrying him out of the room.

"Just allow Dr Taurus to do his work."

"Hmm, let's see." He rummaged around, not taking into account the desperate choking noises that were being made.

"Stop moving about so much! Your going to hurt yourself!"

He let out a final cry for air, before he stopped moving completely.

"There we are, now, was that hard?"

Continuing to rummage about, he eventually came across a bit of metal.

"A-ha! Got you!"

He slowly began to take the claw out, probably ripping apart all the boy's vital organs.

He took out the claw, and examined the car.

"Dear me, do you kids have no taste whatsoever? It's just a boring yellow colour! It's not edgy enough!"

Tutting, he set it down.

He turned back to the kid. "What do you have-"

The boy was slumped over, all the light had went out of his eyes.

"Did I kill another one? Let me check…"

He pulled out a stethoscope, and placed it on his foot.

"Nothing there."

He checked the knee, then the hips, then the ears, then the mouth, then the eyes, then finally the chest.

"No heartbeat… What does that mean again?"

Adam took out the handy dandy _Things New Doctors need to know. _He had bought it off that shady fella in the street.

It had one page. The page read:

_If there is no heartbeat, the person is dead. _

He slotted it back in the drawer. "Hmm, so he's dead."

He looked the child up and down. _Maybe I can bring him back to life? _

He began to perform CPR. That didn't work.

He slapped him a couple times. That didn't work either.

Finally, he took Wilt and stabbed it into his chest, hoping the applied pressure would jump start the heart again.

Surprisingly, that didn't work either.

He opened the door and stepped out. He faced the boy's father. "I regret to inform you that-"

_**Dr Taurus **_

A loud WHAT could be heard in the room of Dr Torchwick and Nurse Neo. They were talking to a teenage girl about social anxiety. Simply resigning himself to the fact that Adam had probably killed someone else, he ignored the shout and continued talking.

"Little missy, you need to stop being socially anxious."

"How?"

"By talking to people."

"How?"

"You walk up and start a conversation with them."

"HOW?"

"Right, no need to raise your voice. You move your feet over to the person, and open your mouth and words come out. Ta-da."

"Your really not helping."

"You are just stubborn, and are not listening to the wise advice I am giving you."

"I'm just stubborn!?"

"Yes. If you were listening to what I am saying-"

"What your saying isn't helping!"

"-then maybe you wouldn't be in this position."

"Uhh! I hate you! I'm leaving!"

She stormed out of the room. Roman sighed and lit a cigar. Bloody teenagers. So arrogant, thinking they knew everything.

From Neo's facial expression, she was thinking the same thing.

Roman was lucky to have a swivel chair, so he rolled over and rang the bell on his door. "Next."

_**Dr Taurus **_

Banesaw was currently making a cup of coffee. After having to restrain that man, and cut his arms off so he wouldn't punch Adam, a nice cup of coffee calmed him right down.

Except there was a problem. He couldn't drink it through his mask. Checking to make sure no one was watching, he took the mask off and took a long sip.

He set it down and put his mask back on. Then, he went back into the surgery room.

"Dr Taurus. This is the 5th patient we've killed."

Adam simply sighed and waved his hand. "I know."

"Don't you think we should do something? I mean-"

"Banesaw, we aren't trained to do this. We weren't given training. This is a self sustaining business. We'll learn as we go along. Trial and error."

Banesaw thought that was quite stupid, but he kept his mouth shut.

"So, any more patients for today? We close in 30 minutes." Adam looked at the clock on the wall.

"Let me check."

Banesaw poked his head out, and looked at the waiting area. There was only one person left. He seemed a awfully… shady fellow.

"Next."

The shady fellow stood up and entered.

"Hello sir. What can I do for you today?" Dr Taurus greeted him with a warm smile.

"I require a glass of water."

Dr Taurus blinked. "Excuse me?"

"I need a glass of water."

"Um, sir, we are a surgery, not a-" Banesaw was cut off.

"Well, okay then."

But the the shady fellow in the black hood pointed at Banesaw.

"He's not allowed to be here. I must drink it with you in private."

That set off all kinds of alarms in Banesaw's head, but Adam simply leant back in his chair and motioned for Banesaw to leave.

He did so reluctantly, closing the door.

_Why would he need to drink a glass of water in private? _

_**Dr Taurus **_

This was weird. Even Adam was beginning to become suspicious of the shady fellow. He was just… sitting there, not saying anything. He drank the glass of water, and set it down when he was finished.

"Come here."

Okay, this was very weird. Adam eyed him up.

"Give me one reason why I should leave this very comfortable position."

"It is important."

Shrugging, Adam walked over to him.

"Lean down." Confused, Adam did.

"Now, close your eyes…"

_Why am I doing this? _

"And die you son of a-"

Adam's eyes flew open, and he narrowly dodged the man chucking the glass at his head. He then leapt over the table, and aimed a punch at his head. Adam ducked, and grabbing a needle, tried to stab him with it. But the shady-

**Okay, I'll stop repeating that now. **

The man grabbed the needle and threw it to the side and drew out a wicked looking knife.

"Aha! What you going to do-"

But then Adam reached into the drawer, and pulled out Wilt and Blush. The mans face fell, as he realised he messed up.

Adam stalked towards him, and the man made the right choice.

He stabbed himself and jumped out a window.

"Serves you right." Adam said simply.

_**Dr Taurus **_

"So, let me get this straight…" Roman said. "A guy comes in, asks for a drink of water, asks you to come over, attack's you, you then pull out you weapon, he then stabs himself and jumps out a window? Did I miss anything?"

"Nope."

"Well, that's quite the story Doctor. But why would someone try and kill you?"

"I don't know. But I'm-"

"Let me guess. Your going to find out."

Adam stood up and looked out the window.

"Exactly. They will not forget this edge lords power."

_**Dr Taurus **_

**Oh no, it's the return of the Vergil references! **

**Thanks for reading and remember: **

"**If the disease doesn't kill you, they will!" **


	3. A slight problem

**Chapter 3: A slight problem **

Dr Taurus was humming the Pink Panther tune to himself as he went about his daily routine. He walked into the surgery to get it ready for the day. Taking out the key, he unlocked the door.

He greeted Banesaw as he entered, only to then turn around in surprise.

"Wait, how are you here? I'm always the first one in!"

"I never leave this place. My soul, my heart, my life, is with the Dr Taurus Agency." Banesaw put his fist to his chest. "My work is never done."

"Right…" He gave him a look as he walked into the operating room.

_Bed, check. _

_Heart rate monitor, check. _

_Big, very intimating needles, check. _

Everything was in place, they were all set and ready to go. Now, all they had to do was wait for Surgeon Torchwick and Nurse Neo to turn up.

Just then, the phone rang. Dr Taurus picked it up.

"Dr Taurus at your service! What can I do for you today?"

"_Adam, it's me, Roman. I'm afraid we won't be able to turn up to work today." _

"Why not?"

"_Neo has come down with a illness of some description. I'm bringing her to the doctors." _

"Bring her here!"

"_No, a actual hospital." _

"We could sort her out!"

He heard Roman sighing. _"I don't have time for this, I'm heading now. See you tomorrow." _

He hung up. Adam sat down with a sigh of his own. Banesaw entered the room.

"It would appear that Roman and Neo are not showing up. Neo has fallen sick."

"So why not bring her here then?"

"I said the same thing, but Roman didn't sound too pleased with that idea. I wonder why…"

"With all due respect Doctor, we are known for killing our patients."

"Ah, but you see Banesaw, it's all in the practice. We'll get there one day. Just need to stay patient and keep working at it."

"Right…"

The phone rang again.

"Dr Taurus at your service! What can I do for you today?"

"_Hello, is this Taurus Pizza?" _

Adam blinked. "Um, no. This is the Dr Taurus Surgery. We don't do pizza."

"_What? Don't lie to me!" _

"I'm not-!"

Banesaw leaned over and whispered "prank call" into Adam's ear.

"Wait, did I say we were a surgery? Nah, I was kidding. We are a pizzeria! Come on down and get your, um, pepperoni and cheese!"

There were sounds of giggling in the background. "_Well, that sounds marvellous! Do you do deliveries?" _

"Why, yes, we do! Could I have your address please?"

They gave them the address, and Dr Taurus hung up. He was grinning widely.

"Let's have some fun."

_**Dr Taurus **_

**A few hours later: **

Banesaw walked right up to the front door. He was wearing a little cardboard hat that Adam had made in about three minutes using some scissors and glue. He was also carrying a box that had _Taurus Pizza _scribbled in black marker. He knocked on the front door.

He could hear several voices coming from the inside.

"Oh my gosh, do you think it's them?"

"No way, they actually serve pizza!"

"It was only supposed to be a prank call!"

"Do we answer it?"

"Go on, do it already!"

He knocked on the door again, louder this time.

"Hurry up, hurry up!"

The door opened to a short, blonde haired girl. She handed him the money. Giggling, she ran back in.

Little did they know, that Dr Taurus had jumped over the back wall and had now opened the backdoor, entering the house.

He watched as they put the "pizza" on the table.

"Let's open it!" The box was flipped open, to find a piece of paper.

"Wait what?"

"No pizza?"

"What does it say?"

One of the boys picked it up.

"It says "I know what your doing you little rats. You think you can prank call me? Do you know who you are messing with here? I am Doctor Taurus, the greatest cunning genius in the world! I am watching you as you read this. If you wish to die, say "Blake Belladonna".

"Huh, what does that mean?"

"BLAKE BELLADONNA!" One of the girls screamed. They all broke out laughing. Dr Taurus approached them from behind, Wilt in his hand.

_**Dr Taurus **_

Banesaw winced as he sat in the LioniseMobile, and heard their cries of pain as Dr Taurus granted them mercy from their poor, sad lives. Who spent all their time with prank calls? Why would you do it? It was a good question, one that would never be answered.

When the deed was done, Dr Taurus strolled out and jumped into the LioniseMobile.

"Let's get going." Banesaw floored the accelerator, and the LioniseMobile shot off.

When they got back to the surgery, flattening several cars and people along the way, Dr Taurus opened the door and stepped in. He then noticed a immediate problem.

There was a long line of people, waiting to be seen.

"Where have you been?"

"We've been waiting for ages!"

"Okay, everyone, calm down. I will be seeing you all now." He strode into the operating room and called his first patient in.

"Hello there sir, how can I help you?"

"My leg is broken, can you-"

"Walk it off. Next."

"I have been bitten by a dog."

"Splash some vinegar onto it."

"Hold on, isn't that for wasp stings-"

"Next."

"I've bashed my head off a door."

"Lie down, rest your head. Next."

"My neck is broken."

"Hot water bottle. Next."

"I've pulled my arm muscle."

"Lift weights. Next."

"I've swallowed a-"

"Do I need to get this out?" Dr Taurus pulled out the big metal claw.

"Uh, no thanks."

"That's what I thought. Next."

"My head hurts."

"Hit it off a wall. Next."

"I'm alcoholic."

"I'm a Doctor, not a therapist. Stop wasting my time. Next."

"I need a arm amputated." Dr Taurus whipped out Wilt and used his semblance to slice it off. He let out a loud cry of pain and limped away.

"Don't cry about it. You told me you needed a arm amputated. Next."

But there was nobody left. All the patients were gone. Whether that was because that was all there was, or whether it was because the arm amputation had scared them off was a very good question.

"Okay, there we are. Time to close it up for the day. All the patients have been taken care."

Banesaw nodded his head and the two of them got ready to close up for the day.

_**Dr Taurus**_

_It has been reported that many people have died after taking medical advice from the Dr Taurus agency…_

"Oh Adam, what have you done now?" Roman groaned. He was sitting in a actual hospital and Neo was lying in the bed just behind him. She weakly raised her head off the pillow, and let out a hacking cough.

_It has also been reported that the bodies of five young people have been found in a house down Lionise Avenue. It is still unclear what killed them, but the police suspect it may be linked to the Dr Taurus Agency as well. _

Roman looked back at Neo. She laid her head back down, and started coughing again.

"Dear me Neo, I'm really glad I didn't take up on Adam's offer if this is what he has done. I'll have to give him a real lecture tomorrow." Neo nodded her head in agreement.

_Why did I agree to take up this job again? _

**Because I forced you to. Mwhaha. **

"Yes, that's right." Roman muttered as RelightTheTorch continued to laugh in the background.

_**Dr Taurus **_

**Mwhahahaha *cough* hahahahaha *cough* **

**Thanks for reading and have a good day!**


	4. Egotistical Author

**Chapter 4: Egotistical Author**

_**Dr Taurus **_

Roman grumbled to himself as he and Neo, who was much better now, got out of their car. But he wasn't grumbling because he had to go to work, he was grumbling because there were three police cars pulled up outside the surgery.

"Adam, what have you done now?" Neo looked at him, and began making some very complicated hand gestures, which included pretending to stab someone, and sneaking up on someone.

"Oh yeah, he's killed those five kids. And he's handed out some pretty poor medical advice. That would explain it." Sighing to himself, he began to walk over to the surgery.

There was a policeman standing outside it, and he was talking to Banesaw, probably questioning him.

"We have had reports that your boss, Adam-"

"I AM A DOCTOR!" A voice roared from inside the surgery.

"Um, yes, I mean, Dr Taurus, has killed five kids down in Lionise Avenue. What do you have to say about this?"

"Well, I can assure you sir, that we would never do something like that. Our medical advice isn't the soundest, I agree, but we would never willingly kill someone. Isn't that right Roman?"

"Yes, that's right Banesaw." The policeman stared at Roman.

"What?"

"You… are a doctor?"

"A surgeon actually."

"And… you are smoking a cigar?"

"Yes, is there a problem here?"

"You work in the health industry, yet you smoke cigars, which is unhealthy."

Roman shrugged. "We aren't actually qualified to, uh, I mean, this is a healthy cigar?"

"A healthy cigar you say?"

"You can buy them at the, uh, healthy cigar store?"

"Hmm…" The policeman stared at him for what felt like a eternity, which made Roman very uncomfortable.

"Could you please-"

"Right,I'm away to question Mr Taurus now."

The policeman walked in, and then…

"IT'S DR TAURUS! WHAT IS SO HARD TO UNDERSTAND ABOUT THAT?!"

"Please Mr Taurus-"

Roman and Neo grimaced as all of the policeman's internal organs were removed, quickly and efficiently. His body was then hurled out the window.

"Um, yes, I think that will be our inspection finished for the day!" Another policeman came running out, jumped into his car, and took off quickly.

"Seriously?" Dr Taurus said when Banesaw, Roman and Neo entered. "Can you believe it? Mr Taurus? MR TAURUS?"

"Maybe the removal of all his organs wasn't quite necessary?" Roman suggested. Adam shot him a glare and Roman raised his hands in surrender. "Okay, maybe it was."

"Well, with that issue all sorted out," Adam walked into the bathroom to clean off all the blood "Would you three mind opening the surgery for the day?"

Adam sighed as he took out a cloth and began washing it all off. _Maybe my methods are a little violent… _Was it really necessary to kill every person who criticised his methods? They were only policemen, they were only doing there job…

_I am a edgy boy, and edgy boys kill people. _

But was the edge needed?

_Yes. _

Was it really needed?

_Shut up brain, or I'll cut you out too. _

**Yes Adam, cutting out your own brain is definitely not going to kill you. **

"Go away author! Go back to writing your OC story or Do What we do best or something."

**You should feel lucky I decided to put you as the main character in this. **

"Aye, cause I'm really relevant in your other two fan fictions."

**You actually are. You're the main antagonist in Do What We Do Best along with the White Fang, and in Criminals and Mentors, well, your kinda relevant. Key word being kinda. **

"I don't care. No one likes OC's nowadays anyways."

**It's the one I put the most time and effort in, yet it's the one that gets the least views. **

"Maybe your just not very good at writing it."

**Well, it's certainly not the best OC story every written, but I don't think it's the worst either! **

"What kind of bloody name is Criminals and Mentors anyway?"

**Because, there are four main characters, two of them are criminals, two of them are teachers at Beacon Academy, so therefore they are mentors. **

"Original."

**Very much so. **

"So anyway, could you please stop promoting your OC story in this story please, and can we get on with the chapter? Your nonsensical rambling has nearly taken up like, three hundred words or something! And we only have about four hundred to five hundred words left of this chapter, because you seem to like making the chapters in this story excessively short!"

**Hey, I have to balance my time between these three fanfics, video games, reading books and school! **

"Whatever. Moving on."

**You son of a- **

_**Dr Taurus **_

Dr Taurus left the bathroom to find out that there was a long list of patients awaiting. His conversation with RelightTheTorch had really went on for far too long. Considering the fact that his surgery was known for killing people, it was really quite popular. Banesaw, Roman, and Neo were working there way through the patients as quickly as they could, but Adam's expertise was needed.

He hurried his way over to them. "What took you so long?" Roman asked.

**Oh, nothing. **

"Oh, right." Roman sighed. What kind of author was egotistical enough to put himself in his own fan fictions? Who did that?

Anyway, the patients were coming through thick and fast. It made no logical sense, considering the police had just been here, but nothing ever made sense with Adam Taurus.

There was one particularly interesting case where a man had got a spider stuck in his ear, but some careful blade twirling by Neo inside his ear, including the destruction of his entire inner ear, got that out.

Aside from that, nothing interesting really happened. They sorted out the patients, killed a few of them, but that was normal at this point. Then, all of a sudden…

A wild shady man attacked!

_**Dr Taurus: Pokemon Battle Edition! **_

Adam wondered what the hell was even happening anymore, as he found himself standing on a massive circle, with his symbol on it, facing his foe, another shady man, like the one from a few days ago.

_Go Shady Man! _

The shady man threw out another shady man. Shocker.

_Go Banesaw!_

"Wait, where am I?"

_Shady Man used Shady Man slash! 120 damage! It wasn't very effective… _

"Did a raindrop just hit me on the chest?"

_What will Banesaw do? _

_Banesaw used chainsaw slash! It was super effective! 5990 damage! _

_Shady Man has fainted! You won! You gained 25 exp and 10 lien! _

_**Dr Taurus **_

"What? That was my strongest Shady Man! How did you beat-Oof!" The shady man was sent tumbling out a window with a kick by Neo.

"What was that? Why was I standing on a platform? What was super effective? Why did I gain experience and lien?"

Adam shrugged his shoulders. He had no clue what that was either. He had actually enjoyed it though, and hoped to see more of it.

"Where do these Shady Men came coming from?" Roman wondered. A question to be answered another day.

Adam was just thinking about how great he was at Pokemon battles.

_**Dr Taurus **_

**Indeed you are Adam Taurus, indeed you are. I'm still making sure this is going below 1300 words though, so take that. **

**Thanks for reading and have a good day! **


	5. RPG Edition

**Chapter 5: RPG edition **

_**Dr Taurus **_

"Shady men of the Shady Men corporation, we are gathered here today in honour of destroying the Dr Taurus surgery! They have humiliated us and robbed us of our pride! We'll watch them fall as we are glorified!"

The shady men were gathered in the shady men house, wearing shady men clothes and wielding shady men weapons. They were very shady.

"We shall not allow them to perform there horrific surgeries on any more people!"

A loud "yes" came up from the crowd.

"They shall not harm anymore people! We will take them down! Fellow shady men of the shady men corporation, are you with me?!"

"YES!"

"Let's take them down!"

"YEAH!"

"We are getting what we deserve!"

"WHO STOLE MY LINE?!" Another voice which sounded very like a certain Dr Taurus was heard.

"Uh, shoot. Shady men, we've messed up now."

"COMMENCE FINAL FANTASY BATTLE MODE!"

_**Dr Taurus: Final Fantasy Edition **_

**The two sides face off against each other, the wind whipping through there hair, as RelightTheTorch tries to make this as dramatic as possible, as the Final Fantasy battle music plays in the background- **

"Wait, wait." Roman said. "Cut the bold text font, stop everything. We can't have Final Fantasy music playing, we'll get a copyright strike! Change it to something a little more, uh, generic."

**Oh well fine then Mr Boring. Go back everybody, do a retake. **

_**Dr Taurus **_

"Uh, shoot. Shady men, we've messed up now."

"COMMENCE GENERIC TURN BASED RPG BATTLE MODE!"

_**Dr Taurus: Generic Turn Based RPG edition**_

**The battle sounds much less epic due to the music being changed, and nobody has a clue what the hell is going on anymore. Why are they fighting in a generic turn based RPG setting? Why has the font changed to bold? But we do not ask those questions in this extremely weird fan-fiction. For now, the Dr Taurus Agency has to face off against there greatest adversaries yet. The Shady Men. **

_**Battle Commence**_

_**Dr Taurus Agency: **_

**Adam Taurus used name change! His name is now Dr Taurus! **

**Roman Torchwick used: Wonder why did Adam change his name to Dr Taurus and waste a turn! **

**Roman Torchwick just wasted his turn! **

**Neo used wink on Shady Man 1! Shady Man 1 has just been seduced by Neo! **

**Banesaw used Come here princess! Since no one is jumping towards him, it didn't work! **

_**Shady Men: **_

**Shady Man 1 is in love with Neo, and has lost all sense of who he was! He is now in eternal servitude to his Ice Cream Queen! **

**Shady Man 1 used slash! It missed for he cannot lay a finger on his Ice Cream Queen! **

**Shady Man 2 used jumping kick on Roman Torchwick! 120 damage! **

**Shady Man 3 used steal item on Dr Taurus! He didn't manage to steal anything… **

**Shady Man 4 used Taunt! All Dr Taurus Agency members will now have to attack him! **

**Shady Man 5 used running punch on Banesaw! 0 damage! **

_**Dr Taurus Agency: **_

**Dr Taurus used "Hello my darling!" All Shady Men members have been hit with the **_**fear **_**effect! Attack for Shady Men lowered by 20%! **

**Roman Torchwick used Complain about the fact he managed to waste his turn! **

**He wasted his turn again! **

**Neo used roundhouse kick on Shady Men 1! 500 damage! **

**Shady Man 1 has been taken out! **

**Banesaw is preparing a special attack!**

_**Shady Men: **_

**Shady Man 2 used spinning back-fist on Neo! Neo dodged it! **

**Shady Man 3 used slash on Roman Torchwick! 96 damage! **

**Shady Man 4 wondered why his Taunt didn't work! Shady Man 4 has wasted his turn! **

**Shady Man 5 used run away! Shady Man 5 has fled the battle! **

_**Dr Taurus Agency: **_

**Dr Taurus used Moonslice! 9998 damage to Shady Man 2! **

**Shady Man 2 has been defeated! **

**Roman Torchwick used curse RelightTheTorch for making him waste his turns! Roman Torchwick has wasted his turn! **

**Neo used chase after Shady Man 5! She has brought Shady Man 5 back into the battle! **

**Banesaw used special attack! Chainsaw Havoc! It dealt 5078 damage to Shady Man 3 and 4! **

**Shady Man 3 and 4 have been defeated! **

_**Shady Men: **_

**Shady Man 5 used "This isn't even my final form!" Shady Man 5 is transforming and screaming very loudly! **

_**Dr Taurus Agency: **_

**Dr Taurus Agency used team attack! **

**Dr Taurus used Moonslice! **

**Roman Torchwick and Neo used Clockwork combo, knocking Shady Man 5 into Banesaw! **

**Banesaw used Come here princess! It worked this time! **

**A total combined 400000 damage! Shady Man 5 has been defeated!**

**Dr Taurus Agency is victorious! **

_**Dr Taurus **_

"What in the world was that?" Roman pondered. He had been extremely confused during that whole ordeal. Neo shrugged and Banesaw was wondering the same thing. Dr Taurus was doing the most insane dance moves anyone had ever seen to celebrate there victory.

"Oh yeah baby! We're the best!" He stopped upon the realisation that he was getting some very weird looks.

"I'm not even going to ask." Roman muttered. Neo nodded her head in agreement. Banesaw was admiring his chainsaw.

"Chainsaw Havoc, huh? How did I do that?"

"Why did I waste so many of my turns?"

Looking around the shady men house, they realised just how sad they were. It was bare, brown walls, brown carpet, brown door, brown everywhere.

"Well, let's get back to the surgery then! To the LioniseMobile!" They all jumped in.

Off they went, shooting through the sky at a hundred miles a hour, and legend has it that if you look out the window, you can see them, the Dr Taurus Agency flying through the sky, ready to probably crash and die.

"Can you please stop making things so dramatic RelightTheTorch?" Banesaw asked. "We are not shooting through the sky at a hundred miles a hour, we are driving along a road, trying not to crash into any cars."

**Oh, alright then. **

It wasn't long before they arrived back at the surgery, except there was a slight problem. Dr Taurus had put his foot down on the accelerator a bit too hard, and they were going too fast and couldn't slow down-!

They smashed into the surgery and killed every last patient in there, who had been waiting very patiently, because there patients, it's what they do. There entire lives revolved around getting seen to, and then probably dying as the Dr Taurus Agency gave them excellent medical advice.

Oh, and there was now a massive hole in the side of the surgery. That wasn't very helpful either.

"Great, absolutely awesome." Roman said. "We've just killed everyone in here. Never mind doctors, we should be renamed the Death Bringer Agency, and then dress in all black and be really edgy and say things like "Death comes for us all" and "The darkness shall consume your soul!"

"Maybe we could set up a death metal band." Banesaw pondered.

"That actually wouldn't be a bad idea. I've always wanted to be in a band."

Dr Taurus simply observed the bodies that lay before him. They had been fathers, mothers, brothers, sisters…

But did he really care? Of course not.

_**Dr Taurus **_

**Deeper and deeper into the madness everyone. Things make even less sense now. **

**Thanks for reading and have a good day! **


	6. A Mysterious Figure

**Chapter 6: A mysterious visitor **

"Ohhhhhhh" Roman was standing outside Dr Taurus' Surgery with a guitar in his hands.

"There's a place I know that's tucked away, a place where injured patients can stay, where children can come to laugh and play, and hopefully not die everyday! I know it sounds hard to believe, but guys and gals it's true! Dr Taurus' surgery is a place for me and you!"

"You can sit and queue for hours on end, hear the screams from the people in the operating room, there's endless possibilities, and that depends on your meaning of hyperbole!"

"Our motto is "If the disease doesn't kill you, we will!" We've got, needles, knives, antibiotics, medicine, angry parents, defibrillators that I can't guarantee will save you from a heart attack, Shady Men trying to kill us, RPG fights, Nurses with a strange addiction to Ice Cream, a very big surgeon with a massive chainsaw…"

He took a loud breath. "It's Dr Taurus' surgery!" No one payed him any heed as they continued on with there day. Someone even attempted to knock the guitar out of his hands. He sighed and looked over at Neo, who was holding up a big sign saying "Dr Taurus' Surgery! A place of fun, laughter, and friendship! We totally aren't skint on money!"

After accidentally ramming the LioniseMobile into the side of the surgery, it had taken all of their combined paycheques to get it fixed, leaving them essentially broke.

Dr Taurus and Banesaw were wondering what they were going to do next. The gas was out, the lights wouldn't switch on, and worst of all, the toilets didn't flush. That was a big problem.

Roman and Neo came back in.

"Any luck?"

"Nope, the song didn't work."

"I'm telling you."Dr Taurus said. "You need to sing it with more enthusiasm! You forget half of the words too!"

"Hey, don't pin this on me! You're the one who crashed the LioniseMobile in the first place! If it wasn't for your terrible driving skills, we wouldn't be in this mess!"

"Now, now." Banesaw held out his hands. "Arguing will get us nowhere. We can only solider forward and hope for the best." Neo nodded her head.

"But still, how are we supposed to get money when no one is coming to our surgery?"

"Perhaps I can help with that." A feminine voice said, and all four of them turned as a women entered the room. She had long black hair, and her eyes were practically covered in eyeliner. She wore a long black trench coat that was buttoned up as well as black and white high heeled boots, which clicked noisily as she walked.

"Whoa." Roman said. He stood up. "And what may a fine lady such as yourself-" Neo slapped him on the back of the head. "Ow!" A slight smirk passed across her face. On her right leg was a tattoo of a symbol none of them had ever seen before. It almost looked like a heart, but with jagged spikes sticking out of it. It looked very weird.

"Ah, a patient!" Dr Taurus didn't miss a beat. "What do you need done? A broken bone? A fractured skull? Please, do tell."

"Actually, I was hoping you four could… help me with something. A small task."

"Lady, we're a surgery." Banesaw said. "We aren't for hire."

"Well, either you can accept it, or you can sit in this dump of a place while it rots." She perched herself up on a table and began swinging her legs back and forth. "Your choice really."

"What… is this task?" Dr Taurus asked. He certainly wanted money to fix up the surgery, but was also very hesitant to just jump right in. He looked over at Roman, and sighed. He was staring at her longingly.

"Not much. All we have to do is kill Jacques Schnees."

"Whoa, whoa, slow right down." Banesaw said. "Did you realise what I said earlier on? We are a surgery! Not assassin's for hire! This fanfiction is called Dr Taurus, so we're supposed to do doctor things! Not run off on special missions with badly designed OCs!"

"Badly designed?" She looked down at herself. "I think I look quite attractive. Roman certainly thinks so from the looks he's giving me." She winked at him and he winked back. Neo put her head in her hands.

"Besides, I'm sure Adam Taurus and the Lieutenant-"

"Ahem. It's Dr Taurus and Banesaw, thank you very much."

She continued on like she hadn't even heard him. "-Will want redemption for the leagues of torture the Schnee Dust Company has put your kind through."

"Redemption?" Adam snapped his head round. "Like "The Bulls Redemption" where I murdered loads of Bumblebee shippers?"

She smiled at him. "I don't see why not."

"Well, that's it then. You can't talk about revenge and expect me to turn it down. I'm in."

"Very good. And the rest of you?"

"Oh my dear lady-" Roman strode forward. "I would be honoured to take up this mission with a lovely girl such as yourself."

"I think this is a very bad idea." Banesaw said to Neo. "She's such a poorly designed OC that she doesn't even have a name!"

"What shall we refer to you as then?" Dr Taurus asked.

"My name is Rebecca." Neo looked up at Banesaw and wagged her finger at him.

"Okay, but still, it's not exactly a original or creative name."

Adam, Roman, and Rebecca had all already turned to leave. Neo began to walk after them. Banesaw, after a moment of regretting all his life decisions, followed after them.

_**Dr Taurus **_

**10 minutes later: **

"CHARGE!" The Shady Men ran at the surgery, only to discover a horrible truth.

"There's nobody here!"

"Check everywhere! They could be anywhere!"

For about twenty minutes straight, tables were overturned, cupboards were opened, and doors were smashed off there hinges as the Shady Men of the Shady Men corporation looked everywhere, but alas, they did not find anything. A couple of medical tools, but that was about it.

"Darn it! They must have left!"

"We shall sit here and wait for there return then!"

The Shady Men didn't know that they would be waiting for quite some time.

_**Dr Taurus **_

**Oh no, they aren't going to be at the surgery anymore! **

**Shock, horror! **

**Apologies for the longer wait then usual. If I'm honest, I just kind of forget to write this. Not sure how that happened, but ah well. **

**Next time: The Dr Taurus Agency set off with this mysterious figure to kill Jacques Schnee for, some reason. **

**Thanks for reading and have a good day!**


	7. Nice to Schnee you

**Chapter 7: Nice to Schnee you**

_**Dr Taurus **_

"Why are we doing this?" Banesaw said as they warped through space and time. Turns out that Rebecca was a overpowered OC as well, as she could literally just teleport them all to the Schnee Dust Company manor.

"RelightTheTorch must have been feeling particularly lazy when he decided she could just warp us all there." He muttered. "What's the point in having a section where we actually travel there, instead, let's just teleport there instead! That'll definitely get the reader interested!"

**Insult my writing again Banesaw, and see what happens. I'll kill your relevance faster than you killed that patient in the first chapter! **

"Sure you will." Eventually, they came to a stop outside the Schnee Dust Company manor. Dr Taurus marched straight up to the door, and was about to bang on it when Rebecca stopped him.

"Hey, cool it! We can't just charge straight in!"

"Why not? If you can teleport all four of us here, you must be a mage or something else that breaks the rules and physics of RWBY completely. You could probably just blast the door down, and kill Jacques Schnee with a flick of your finger. In fact, why do we need to be here?"

"For the plot." She said simply.

"Oh, okay then."

Roman was still eyeing Rebecca up. Neo was frantically slapping him on the head, trying to get him to stop, but he was love struck.

"Let's not knock on the door then, and instead find a alternate route in, how's that for a idea?"

"I can live with that." Dr Taurus stated.

And with that, the quest to find a alternate route into the manor had begun. So of course, the only logical first step was to see if there was a back door.

"Hmm, let me see… Aha! There is a back door! We can go in through it!" Dr Taurus exclaimed.

"We can't do that either!" Rebecca exclaimed. "It needs to look as cool as possible! We need to bust in through the roof or something, this is boring! The readers don't want stealth, they want stuff blowing up and explosions!"

"Those are the same things." Banesaw said. "You can't just say the same thing but in a different way and act like it's two completely different things."

"Oh shut it you!"

"You can't say I'm wrong."

"Regardless, I think it would be easier to walk in through the back door." Dr Taurus said. "It would be much simpler."

"Okay, put it to a vote then. Who agrees with Adam's idea?"

"IT IS DOCTOR TAURUS YOU BLACK HAIRED POORLY DESIGNED IMBECILE!"

"Poorly designed?! Who are you calling poorly designed edgelord?!"

"Oh, that's it! You've crossed a line now girly! Dr Taurus is about to whip out the ole Moonslice!" He took Wilt out of it's sheath. "Time to show you what happens-"

"What is all this ruckus?" Jacque Schnee poked his head out the door. "Can't a man enjoy his coffee in peace?!" They all stared at him.

"Okay then Schnee, I regret to inform you that we must kill you now." Dr Taurus announced.

"Wait, why?"

"Because the plot says so!" Dr Taurus threw his sword into Jacque's chest, killing him instantly.

"There we go! Task done!" Rebecca announced. "Since I am a one off who may secretly return as a bad guy later on, I must now teleport you all back to your surgery while mysteriously vanishing myself! Oh, and your surgery will be magically fixed up too!"

"Wait what-"

_**Dr Taurus **_

The next thing they knew, they were back in the surgery with it all fixed up.

"What was that?" Roman groaned. "What was the point in all of that if she wasn't even going to stick around?"

"Did she mention something about returning as a bad guy?" Banesaw said.

"I don't know. But, at least the surgery is fixed now!" Dr Taurus said.

"SHADY MEN, CHARGE!"

"Oh no, not again!"

It was actually much easier to kill the Shady Men this time around, because there was no dramatic RPG battle happening, no epic music playing, no coats flapping in the wind, it was just a fight, one that ended very quickly when the Shady Men were shot, punched, cut in half with a chainsaw, and blown to pieces.

"And done." Dr Taurus said. "That was fairly easy. Now, back to work."

Since the surgery was magically fixed up, it took no time at all to get everything back up and running. And with that out of the way, it was time to get back to doing what they did best. Killing people while trying to make them better.

The first patient was a man who had a blister of some sort on his tongue. There was only one way to fix this. And that was for Nurse Neo to get her blade out and attempt to cut the blister out.

"AHH!"

"Shh, calm down sir, it's going to be okay!" Dr Taurus said.

His continued squeals of pain proved very annoying after a while, so Neo decided to just cut the entire tongue out. He accidentally swallowed his own tongue, and began to choke and gag.

"Now sir, was that really so hard?" Dr Taurus asked.

"She cut out my tongue!" The man said, or he attempted to say. It sounded more like "She ctu otu ym tnouge!"

"Sorry? I don't speak my tongue has been cut out language. Anyway, your cured now, so off you go."

The man continued to gag and choke and he may very well have died when he left the office, but Dr Taurus wasn't responsible for anything that was outside his office.

"Next!"

Next up was a boy who was suffering from heart disease. So of course, the only logical solution was to cut the heart out.

They politely asked the parents to leave the room, and set the young boy down on the operating table.

"What are you going to do?"

"Oh, not much. Just a small operation. Shouldn't take too long. Just let me knock you out first."

"With anaesthetics?"

"No, my dear boy. With my fist." He punched him in the face, knocking him out. With that out of the way, it was time to start operating.

They began by cutting his chest open, a rather simple procedure which involved Banesaw using his chainsaw to saw it open. Then it was just a simple matter of grabbing the heart and pulling it out, still beating. Once that was done, well, that was it. The operation was finished. The boy no longer had a heart and was about to die, but at least he didn't have heart disease anymore.

"There we go! Call in the boys parents and tell them that it's done!" Surgeon Torchwick said to Banesaw. He went out and brought the parents in.

"Done!" Dr Taurus said. "You can take him home now."

_**Dr Taurus **_

**Oh Adam, you cruel, cruel, monster. **

**So I should apologise for just disappearing for nearly a month. Not really sure how that happened, but it did. On the bright side though, I have another Adam story planned that may be uploaded before or after Dr Taurus is complete. If you want more details, take a look at my profile.**

**I'm not sure how many chapters exactly I want Dr Taurus to have. It'll be longer than The Bulls Redemption, so say around 15-20 for the meantime. **

**Thanks for reading and have a good day!**


	8. Smooth Doctor

**Chapter 8: Smooth Doctor**

_**Dr Taurus **_

"Adam, Adam, Adam!" Surgeon Torchwick came dashing into the room. "We have a serious problem!"

"What? Has the sink busted again? Did I forget to pay the electricity bill?"

"No, even worse than that!"

"Well, what is it then?"

"Team RWBY are here!"

Doctor Taurus started laughing. "Oh, you're a funny one Torchwick! You are so hilarious!"

"I'm not joking! Look!" Dr Taurus looked out his office room window. And indeed, Roman was right. Team RWBY were standing there. Blake was bent over and was coughing.

"Oh no, and it's Blake who's sick! This is even worse!" Dr Taurus put his hands on either side of his head and jumped up. "There's only one thing to do! Neo, get the jukebox out! Roman, get the fedora's! Banesaw, bring Blake into the operating room!"

"Why? What are we doing? And since when did we have fedora's?" Banesaw asked.

"You'll find out."

Banesaw shrugged and walked out the door.

"Okay, we'll be seeing her now."

"Don't worry Blake, I'm sure you'll be fine!" Yang said.

"Hold on a second" Weiss pointed at Banesaw. "Have we… met somewhere before?"

"No, we haven't. Quickly now Miss Belladonna!" He quickly walked away before Weiss could recognise him.

He lead her into the operating room.

"Now, just jump up onto that bed for me, and the doctor will be out to see you in a second!" He ran into the back room.

"Are we ready?"

"Hold on a second!" Dr Taurus came out dressed in a white blazer with a blue shirt underneath, a white tie, blue cuffs on the arms, and a white fedora on his head with a black band. Roman and Neo were dressed in black checkered blazers and trousers, white shirts, with black fedoras on there heads. Even Roman had switched out his normal bowler hat for one.

"This is… certainly something."

"Quick Banesaw! You need to get changed!" He got the same clothes that Roman and Neo were wearing thrown at him.

"Okay, Neo, do you have the jukebox ready?" She saluted to him.

"Banesaw, hurry up!"

"I'm almost ready!"

"Right, get ready everyone!"

As soon as Banesaw was ready, it was time to begin. Adam quickly took his mask off and set it down.

"Put the music on!"

They slowly opened the door and stepped in. Blake looked up and paled even more.

"A-Adam?" She began coughing again. They all took spots around the bed as the jukebox made some very creepy breathing noises for a minute, until the actual music kicked in.

Adam let out a very loud high pitched "WAOH" which scared the daylights out of Blake.

"What are you-" Neo moonwalked over to the bed, in high heels of all things, and put her finger to Blake's lips, before joining the others in walking slowly around the bed, in a very choreographed manner. This continued for a bit until Adam began to sing.

"As she came into the operating room though, was the sound of a doctor. Ah, he began trying to make you better, but he accidentally left the bloodstains on the carpet. Ah, she run underneath the table, oh wait she couldn't, because she was sick. So now your old partner, is proving, he can dance better than you!"

Despite the fact she was sick, Blake still couldn't help but roll her eyes. They were still strutting around the bed, pulling off epic dance moves in a very precise manner.

"Blake are you okay, so Blake are you okay, are you okay Blake, Blake are you okay, so Blake are you okay, are you okay Blake-" This continued on for ages.

"Blake are you okay? Will you tell me, that your okay? There's a sign at the table, then she struck you-" At that exact moment, Neo jumped over and used a otoscope to look in her ears. "A ice cream psychopath Blake. The doctor came over to the table, left your friend's arm, on the carpet. Your still sick so you can't run, you were struck down, it was your doom."

"So Blake are you okay, so Blake are you okay-"

"I am not okay!"

"Are you okay Blake? You've been hit by, you've been hit by, a Smooth Doctor!"

They continued to dance around her bed while Blake slowly moaned to herself.

"So they came into the surgery, it was Monday, what a busy day. We might have to perform mouth to mouth resuscitation, listen to your heartbeat, or even cut you open. Blake are you okay, so Blake are you okay, are you okay Blake-"

They put their feet together and started jumping like that, somehow in a very choreographed manner. Then Adam stopped doing it and walked over to Blake's bed while the others continued to do it. He took her pulse while continuing to sing.

"Blake are you okay? Will you tell us that your okay? There's a sign at the bedside, then he struck you" All of a sudden, he took out a big needle and poked her with it, and she yelped in surprise. "A big intimidating needle Blake. The doctor came over to your table, left your friends arm, on the carpet. I'm afraid that you simply cannot run, you were struck down, it was your doom. Blake are you okay, so Blake are you okay, are you okay Blake. You've been hit by, you've been struck by, a Smooth Doctor!"

Blake was beginning to contemplate just getting off the bed and leaving. It was clear they had no intention of treating her. But she was also so memorised by the whole thing that she couldn't leave.

"_Okay, I would like everyone to clear the area right now." _

Then they literally broke gravity itself by leaning forward in such a way that should not have been possible. She definitely wasn't leaving now.

"Blake are you okay, will you tell us, that your okay?" Roman began making some high pitched noises in the background. "There's a sign at the bedside, then he struck you, a crescendo Blake. The doctor came over to your table, left the bloodstains on the carpet, then you tried to run away, but you were struck down, it was your doom."

"Blake are you okay-"

"DEAD WOMEN!" Roman suddenly shouted. Blake was feeling extremely uncomfortable now. "Dead women baby!"

"Will you tell us that your okay? There's a sign at the bedside, then he struck you, a crescendo Blake. The doctor came over to your table, left the bloodstains on the carpet. Then you ran out of the surgery, you were struck down, it was your doom."

After Adam performed a moonwalk, Blake decided it was for the best that she left.

"Oh, look, it's a miracle, I'm all better now!" She quickly dashed out of the room and ran out the door, much to the confusion of her team.

"Okay, you can stop the music now." Dr Taurus told Neo. She switched the jukebox off.

"How did we do that?" Banesaw asked.

"Tell them Roman!"

"Well, I recently figured out that my semblance is the ability to organise everyone into a well choreographed dance routine. Bit random really, but there you go."

"Also, why did Blake run out of the room?"

"She was cured." Dr Taurus said. "With the power of Smooth Doctoring."

_**Dr Taurus **_

**I actually have a question. In the last verse of Smooth Criminal, is it Dead Women that's being sung in the background? That's what I've always thought. Oh, and also, if you haven't heard Smooth Criminal, you should definitely listen to it, as well as watch the dance that goes with it. It's a masterpiece. **

**Thanks for reading and have a good day!**


	9. Advertisement Problems

**Chapter 9: Advertisement Problems**

"Everybody come to Dr Taurus' surgery." Roman was standing outside in a big teddy bear outfit, performing a little dance. He was hating his very existence, but he did it anyway. All it took was a promise from Adam that he would buy more cigars.

"If you die, we'll bring you back to life!" Neo had written the lyrics, and he had just rolled with them, asking no questions, even though they made no sense.

"It's so much fun, and you might even win a hun!" That line was the perfect example of that. Several people gave him extremely odd looks. He grumbled to himself and continued to dance and sing.

"Do you think this is going to work?" Banesaw asked Dr Taurus.

"Of course it will, there's no reason why it won't!"

"Well, to be fair, he's been doing that for about a hour now, and nobody has even came near our surgery."

"Just give it a little bit of time." Adam said. "People will come soon, I promise you."

They waited for about another hour. Nobody came. Roman came back inside and chucked the bear suit to the side.

"This isn't going to work." He stated simply. "We need to come up with another way of advertising this surgery to people."

"Hmm…" Dr Taurus put his hand under his chin and began to think. Neo copied his motion. "Ah, I've got it!"

"What?"

"People must be scared that bad stuff goes on inside! We need to show them that nothing bad happens, ever! We need to make…" Dr Taurus jumped high up in the air and did a stupid pose. "A advertisement!"

"Hold on, don't we already have one on television?" Roman asked. "You know, the whole, are you panicking thing?"

"Ah, but my dear Torchwick, that one is out of date! We need to create a new one! And we are going to do it, right now!"

_**Dr Taurus **_

Oscar Pine was panicking extremely hard. His aunt had contracted some kind of deadly sickness, and he had no clue how to cure it. He was at his wits end, but just when it seemed all hope was lost, a advertisement flicked to life on the television.

"_Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to Dr Taurus' surgery!" _A picture of a very big needle came up on the screen, and then someone took the needle and there was a cry of agony in the background as it sunk into someone's flesh.

"_The best surgery in all of Remnant! Guaranteed satisfaction! Just look at all these happy patients!" _A picture of a man missing a leg flew up on screen, as well as child missing a eye, a women missing a tongue…

"_And the best part is, this service is entirely free! All you have to do is surrender your soul and hand over your bank account details to our trusted associate, Surgeon Torchwick!" _

Oscar nearly fell out of his seat as Roman Torchwick, convicted criminal, came up on the screen, holding stacks of money and grinning to himself.

"_Once you've done that, our team of untrained experts will get straight to work curing you, or your loved one! Amputation, mental torture, and moon slices are just some of the ways we set about helping our patients get back to full strength again! Our staff are extremely helpful, and will not hesitate to not answer your questions! Stay Lionised folks, and remember: _

_If the disease doesn't kill you, we will!" _

Upbeat music continued to play in the background until the TV switched off completely and fell off it's stand, hitting the floor with a mighty crash. Oscar was just about to rush his aunt to this clearly amazing surgery, when he realised something.

_It didn't say where they were located…_

_**Dr Taurus **_

"Don't you think we should have put the location of where the surgery actually is in the advertisement?" Banesaw said. Dr Taurus laughed.

"Oh no, we are so infamous at this point that everyone knows where we are! Do not fret Banesaw, people will come bashing on our doors before you know it!"

"Is… that a good thing?" Roman asked. "Because if someone comes bashing on our doors, it's probably the police coming to arrest us."

"No, no, it's the sound of the sick patients who want to be cured!" He was smiling in a really sadistic manner.

"Right…" Roman looked at Banesaw, who looked at Neo, who looked at Adam, who looked back at Roman.

"Don't you think we should maybe adopt some less violent measures?" Banesaw suggested. "I mean-"

Adam suddenly raced over and grabbed Banesaw by the throat.

"Less… violent… measures? I am not sure you understand Lieutenant." Neo gasped loudly when he referred to him as the Lieutenant, until she realised she was supposed to not be able to make a noise, and quickly closed her mouth.

"Violence is the only way. The humans must suffer and die. I have lived a long and painful life, because of them, and they will feel my wrath… Except for Roman and Neo of course!" He dropped Banesaw and smiled happily at Roman and Neo, who both took a step back.

"So, anyway, after that little… disagreement, I think our advertisement will work perfectly fine! No problems with it whatsoever!"

"I disagree." Banesaw muttered. Dr Taurus spun around extremely fast.

"If you have nothing to say that isn't praising me and my ideas, don't say it."

"Or what?"

Adam took out Wilt and ran his finger along the blade. Banesaw, deciding he would rather live to fight another day, nodded his head.

"Of course. Please accept my apology."

"Great! Now we wait for the advertisement's effects to take hold."

Everybody stared at him. "The effects?"

"Yes! Our advertisement is loaded with so much suffering, that people will begin to feel really negative, and negative thoughts lead to people getting sick, meaning more patients will come here, meaning more money."

"That's actually not a bad plan…" Roman commented. "But what about the whole selling your soul and handing over your bank account details stuff?"

"You'll be in charge of that. You just simply need to take the persons soul, so there just a corpse devoid of all emotion, so they won't need a bank account anymore, so they will definitely give them to you!"

Roman blinked. "Right. And how exactly do I take a person's soul?"

"By using this." Adam handed him a vacuum cleaner which was named _Soul Sucker 3000. _

"And how do I use it?"

"Like any other vacuum cleaner. Point it at the person who's soul you want to suck, hit this button here, and bam, you've got their soul! Anyway, the rest of us need to get ready for the wave of patients who are going to come due to our advertisement. Have fun!"

Adam, Neo and Banesaw left the room, leaving Roman with his new vacuum cleaner, wondering how in the world Adam had managed to obtain such a device.

_**Dr Taurus **_

**We've went from simple operations to sucking people's souls. Adam is such a nice person. **

**Thanks for reading and have a good day! **


	10. CoronaVirus Pandemic

**Chapter 10: CoronaVirus Pandemic **

"Dr Taurus, we have a serious problem!" Banesaw came running in. Dr Taurus simply sighed loudly.

"Don't we always have a serious problem Banesaw? Tell me something I don't know. Why not a good problem? Why can't you come charging in and say- "

"Surely you must have heard the news! Remnant is under attack!"

"Under attack?" Dr Taurus sprung out of his chair. "Has Salem finally decided to get her lazy backside off her chair and do something for once?"

"Who's Salem?" Banesaw asked. Dr Taurus then remembered that only he was equipped with the knowledge of the entire plot of RWBY, granted to him by the author.

"Never mind that! Anyway, who's attacking? Is it the Grimm? Have the Fair Game and Bumblebee shippers teamed up?"

"It's even worse than that! We are experiencing a global pandemic! Quick, grab the masks!" Banesaw suddenly charged into the room behind him, and Dr Taurus watched him go.

"But you already have a mask!" Dr Taurus called after him.

"Neo, this is for your own good, I promise!" He turned around to see Roman forcing Neo into a room as she made constant whimpering noises.

"What are you doing to her?" Dr Taurus asked Roman.

"Adam, help me get her into this room! She's had a really bad cough and we need to isolate her!"

Dr Taurus rushed over and then suddenly realised something. If he got close to Roman, he was in serious danger of catching it if.

"Wait, we need to be at least two metres away from each other! Sorry Roman, but I can't help!"

"Damn it Adam! Neo, please, I'm begging you!" She suddenly forced her way out of his grip and shot down the stairs. "Come back!"

"We need to go after her! She's going to affect everyone with the Coronavirus!" Banesaw charged out of the room, following Roman in pursuit of Neo.

_Well, guess I better lock myself in a room then. _That was the only way to ensure he wouldn't catch it. He had a whole stack of video games he could play, so it wouldn't be that bad. However, there was a slight problem.

Hundreds upon hundreds of patients were lined up outside the surgery, all sneezing and coughing like there was no tomorrow. This was bad. This was extremely bad! He was going to have to cure them all! But how could he, when no vaccine had been made yet?

_Time to do what I do best. _Murder people. He couldn't cure them all, so why not kill them all? It was a pretty good alternative solution.

Taking out Wilt and Blush, he slowly and calmly began to make his way down the stairs towards the large crowd of patients. Hold on though, how was he supposed to kill people when he wasn't supposed to be within two feet of them? He couldn't attempt to cure them without getting close, but he couldn't kill them without getting close either! What was he supposed to do? Wave his hand and say "Abracadabra, you are all healthy?" Was he supposed to conveniently forget that he had a gun like that time he charged at Blake and got stabbed by her and Yang? It really was a puzzling matter. Luckily, he didn't have to conveniently forget his sheath was also a gun, and he had practiced his aim in all those first person shooter video games he had played, so this should be easy, right?

He aimed his sheath at the crowd and opened fire, dropping several people in a matter of seconds. That caused people to start screaming and running away, so therefore the problem was solved. It was rather anticlimactic, but Dr Taurus lived by the motto, kill first, ask questions later.

All he had to do now was locate Roman and Banesaw. Poor Neo would have to be isolated, but that was okay. He could deliver ice cream to her door every day and that would keep her happy.

"Dr Taurus, we have a serious problem!" Banesaw ran up the stairs towards him.

"You've already said that." Dr Taurus stated. "Come on Banesaw, at least try to be a little creative with your word choice."

"This is even more serious than the Coronavirus!"

"The Fair Game and Bumblebee shippers have teamed up, haven't they?" Not again! Couldn't the Bumblebee shippers just leave him alone for once?

"Even worse! Neo has gone missing!" That caught his attention pretty quickly.

"You lost her?"

"Not just her, but Roman too! They both just disappeared. I was on their tails, and then I lost them."

"So, did they disappear, or did you lose them? Those are two very different things Banesaw."

"Both! They disappeared and I lost them!" Dr Taurus was just confused now. How did someone disappear while being lost? It was a bit baffling. Well, not really. Someone could be lost in a forest and then a black hole could open up beneath their feet, sending them to their certain deaths.

"What do we do now? We need them to run the surgery!" Banesaw exclaimed. Dr Taurus thought about it. Then, he thought about it some more. Finally, he thought about it for a while, and came to his conclusion.

"I can't go after them. They may both have the coronavirus, and I cannot risk catching it. I shall have to run the surgery on my own, while you chase after them."

"How? Everyone will have the coronavirus by this point, and you've just demonstrated that you'll kill anyone who has it!"

"Do not fret Banesaw. We both know that my medical expertise is simply fantastic. I shall be just fine on my own, and will use my judgement on whether to kill someone or not. Now, go get our ginger friend and his ice cream sidekick back."

"Very well then. Good luck Adam- I mean, Doctor Taurus." With a bow, Banesaw was gone from the surgery in seconds. Now Adam was all on his own.

_This shall certainly be interesting. _

_**Dr Taurus **_

**It feels pretty good to write this story again, not gonna lie. The world seems to have went pretty mad though. It's going to be a pretty crazy few months. **

**There's a update on my profile which I would encourage you all to read, as it will address my fanfiction going forward, and my original story which will be posted over on FictionPress (Yeah, I'm writing a original story, which is a big yikes.) **

**I am going to try my best to write Dr Taurus a bit more though. It doesn't take me that long, so why I seem to go for months without writing it really shows how lazy I am. **

**Anyway, remember to stay inside, wash your hands properly, and unleash your inner introvert! Thanks for reading, and don't forget: **

"**If the disease doesn't kill you, we will!" **


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